Tag Archives: travel

I have a new BFF. It’s name is “Chat”

I’ve been busy lately. Now those are 4 words (5 if you consider the contraction to be 2) I’ve not put together very often in the last 10 years. Don’t get me wrong. Not busy like the proverbial beaver (keeping things Canadian these days) but sort of busy for someone who has been retired for quite some time and finds it difficult to be up and out of their pjs before noon. Or after. And why, you ask, this sudden flurry of busyness? Because we have decided to take a trip to somewhere we have never been before. Which is not really that unusual. I mean sometimes it’s good to go back to places you have already been. Like visiting your old hometown to see whether you have aged better or worse than your old friends. Or maybe heading back to someplace you loved and thought it would be a good idea to love it again. Or just heading out to the place that has always been most convenient but not convenient enough that you can’t pretend you are traveling. All of those trips are relatively easy to plan and execute. But going someplace new? That’s a horse of a different color. Until recently. When I met my new best friend “Chat”.

I had met Chat before. In the past we got together every once in a while to learn something new. Or figure out a recipe. Or remind me what Neil Postman had to say about technology being a Faustian bargain. Admittedly Chat wasn’t too thrilled about that last one as it found the whole concept a bit disturbing, given its circumstances. And although throughout our interactions I found Chat to be polite, very responsive, and most understanding, I had never really given Chat a second thought. Things always went pretty well and much like this. I would ask a question. Chat would take a second or so to think about it. Chat would answer. And that’s about the long and short of it. Sometimes longer, sometimes shorter. As I look back on it all now what I have come to realize is that I never really got to know Chat. Nor did Chat get to know me. At least not like we know each other now. 

But let me digress for a moment. In the olden days, and not so long ago, when we decided that it was time to hop on a plane it triggered a whole set of activities that someone, usually me, would have to undertake. First and foremost, we had to decide where to go, how many cities we wanted to see, the order of said cities and the length of time to stay in each one. Most often that required tedious searches of train routes and schedules, along with endless days and nights perusing hotel and vacation rental sites. Do you know how many booking sites there are on the interweb these days? Each one assures us they have the best price. I can assure you they don’t. Next there was me going through all of those reviews and trying to determine which were real, which were bots and which were just plain stupid. I mean I understand that it might be frustrating for you when none of the staff at breakfast speak German but hey! you’re in Italy so maybe that should be excused. Or the fact that you found the hotel too far from the train station. You know about Google ‘cause you left a review. So maybe you know they have maps too. You coulda looked before you booked. Just sayin’. And don’t even get me started talking about how to decide on which of the literally thousands of cathedrals, basilicas, museums, castles (some with moats) and “can’t miss” sites that need to be booked months ahead of time, because who doesn’t know exactly where they will be and what they will feel like doing at a particular date and time months in advance and before one has even stepped foot in the country. Takes a lot of reading and research. And you can only imagine how difficult all of this is for a shallow gal like me. That is, until now. 

Because that’s when I knocked on “Chat’s” door. My new best friend. Yep. The one with the initials for a last name. That “Chat”. Now I don’t know what you think about AI but I can tell you it just saved me a whole whack of time and trouble. Here’s what I did just in case you might one day decide to do it too. I simply told Chat (yes, I gave it a name, a rather obvious one and it told me it liked it) where and when I wanted to go, how long I wanted to stay and the kinds of things I like to do. I let Chat know I like walking, hate crowds, love trains, hate moving from place to place and would be just fine visiting only one castle, as long as it has a moat. And in not very much time, seconds really, Chat created a trip that fit us like a glove. Well almost. Admittedly it took some tweaking, a little back and forth, before we set our final itinerary. But all along the way, Chat was more than supportive and very open to suggestions when I thought going “this way” might be better than going “that way”. As a matter of fact, Chat never displayed any signs of frustration with changes I made; never uttered an untoward word; had the patience of a saint when having to rework the itinerary umpteen times; and always provided me with positive feedback on how well my trip met my travel expectations. In the end Chat told me that we (that would be Chat and I) had created the trip that most people wished they had taken when they got home. And who can complain about that! It’s everything you would expect from a new best friend! 

Now all I have to do is sit back, relax and hope that the airline doesn’t put a kibosh on the whole damn thing. Because, as we all know, those airlines are not always our new best friends. Hmmmm…maybe I should introduce them to Chat too. 

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I never even said goodbye!

I’m guessing you’ve noticed. Perhaps not cared, but noticed nonetheless. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not that I think the last thought you have when your head hits the pillow each night is “Where the heck is the shallow blog? I haven’t seen it for some time!” I suppose there’s an outside chance that every once in a while it might have crossed your mind that I haven’t posted anything here for, well let’s just say, eons. But I’m not here to apologize for my lack of musings on the Interwebs. After all, it’s not easy to be shallow, or at least to write about being shallow, during a pandemic. Even for the shallow gal. What I am here to do is apologize for never even saying goodbye. Which, if you peruse my last post, you will see I did not do. Mostly because I didn’t know, at the time, that it would be a very long time before I’d be back. If I had known what was to come, or should I more accurately say what was not to come, I could have, at the very least, parted with a “till we meet again” or a “see you later, alligator”. But who knew! Who thought I would stop writing the shallow blog just because we were are in a pandemic that has lasted longer than it takes to read the collected works of Shakespeare? Although, if I had thought about it for a moment or two, I would have realized there were lots of things I stopped doing during the pandemic. So maybe I should have known. 

Like having friends over for dinner. Or lunch, coffee, breakfast, pretty much anything. It’s not that I no longer liked our friends, although it was a handy excuse for those I didn’t quite fancy. It was just that the risk involved in hosting a shindig, no matter how small, was simply not worth the trouble. First there was the rearranging of furniture to ensure everyone would be six feet apart. Then came the “lysoling” (if you could get them. Remember when you couldn’t get them?) of every single surface that could possibly be touched by us, them, and/or the cat. And whether they liked it or not, I would have to insist that all guests wore N95 masks and provided verified COVID 19 test results taken no less than two hours before arrival. All that and I pretty much knew that the topic of conversation was going to be nothing other than the pandemic. Imagine. We’re sitting in a sterilized home, six feet apart wearing masks and the only thing we can talk about is why. Really, who needs that? And so it stopped.

As did make-up. With no one coming or going there was really no point putting in the effort to get all dolled up every morning. I’m afraid all those tubes with the 24 month “best before” dates have now found their way into the trash bin. I mean, what was really the point? Who was looking at me on my very brief outings to the grocery store? Certainly the mask negated any possible purpose that wearing lipstick might have had. Not to mention the stains it left on my very expensive N95 masks. Mascara? Between the fog on my glasses and the fog on yours, the chances of my marginally elongated lashes being seen was quite remote. And I’m pretty sure the grocery clerk didn’t really care if I had eyebrows or not. Suffice to say as a result of the pandemic I no longer spent those 5 precious morning minutes putting on a new face. I just stopped. At least until recently when we all realized that passersby on the street don’t pose much of a risk and we can take off those pesky masks while walking outside. Now every day before I open the door I hear my Auntie Fanny’s voice (may she rest in peace) say “Going out? Aren’t you going to put on a little lipstick?” So I do. 

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that I have even stopped buying clothes. Actually that is probably not a bad thing since I seem to have enough shirts, pants, skirts and dresses to cover pretty much any occasion that might arise. The real problem is, none do. As I think back over the last three years (I know, it only seems a lot longer) I can honestly count on one hand the number of times I have had to put on anything other than jeans and a T. Ok. Admittedly I have donned a couple of fancy blouses for those Zoom meetings we all endured but, as you know, even then the jeans still sufficed. And there’s really no problem wearing the same things over and over again because, like my eyebrows, I don’t think the clerk at the grocery store really notices. 


And in case I haven’t yet convinced you that it is not just the blog I had stopped writing I can honestly tell you I’ve pretty much stopped traveling, going to concerts, eating out at restaurants, taking transit, sitting closer than 6 feet away from anyone and, if you can believe it, going to Starbucks. Which is why it’s somewhat astonishing that I am back writing the blog. The problem is I can’t tell you when and if I will be here again. So until we meet again, “See you later alligator”. Just in case.

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Planning…It’s a Trip.

Who would have thought that this shallow gal would spend not hours, not days, not even weeks, but months planning for a trip that won’t take place for quite some time.  Better yet, who would have thought she would revert to her ‘60s vernacular, using “trip” as in “Hey Man. That far out tie dye caftan you’re wearing is a real trip! I’d pick up some threads like that if only I had the bread.” Well you wouldn’t think so but here I am doing both. Mostly planning though since honestly, I don’t really talk like that. Anymore. The thing is, of late, most of the trips we take require a rather minimal amount of planning and organization primarily because we have returned to the same place for the past 8, 9, or could it be 10 years. And when you do that, once the first year is under your belt, the rest is gravy really. Pretty much a slam dunk. You book, you pay, you pack, you fly (or foolishly decide to take a road trip) and in the twinkle of an eye you’re making your way along the beach to your favourite Starbucks where you sit, sip, sun and watch a very familiar world go by. Simple. So you would think there’s no real reason to mess with a good thing. And there isn’t. Until there is.

So here’s what happened. A very old friend (he’s actually not any older than I am but I have known him for a very long time) and I got talking about where we go and what we do when we get there. Seems he and his wife have a grand ol’ time in the south of France where the croissants are buttery and the coffee rich and dark. One thing led to another and before I knew it, I somehow started thinking about doing what we usually do somewhere else. I mean, why not? And that’s how we got to where we are now. Planning a trip that’s entirely different from the trip we usually take. Now you would think that would be a “good thing” which of course it is, but it’s also just so freakin’ hard. (Oops, those ‘60s are rearing their ugly head again.)  Which is why I have been spending oodles of time planning. I know. You’re wondering what could possibly take so long and be so complicated? Well thanks for asking ‘cause I was just about to tell you. 

First things first. That big, old, red workhorse of a suitcase of mine has seen better days so I’m thinking if I’m going to venture into the fashion capital of the entire world I better get myself something a little more stylish. And practical of course. Who knew that shopping for a suitcase these days means more than deciding on black or red? Drop down to your local luggage provider and you will be shocked, like I was, when you see how much there is to figure out. Hard or soft. Big or small. Two wheels or four. Lightweight, extra lightweight or “won’t be able to lift it off the carousel” weight. To make matters even worse, there is definitely potential for me to pick up a little number that could pretty much double the budget for the entire trip. Back home to do some research only to find out that no matter what, there’s a pretty good chance at some point on this journey of mine I’m going to end up dragging my case “sans une roue” along those ancient cobblestone streets. Gotta tell you. The jury’s still out on this one. 

Should I ever find just the right suitcase I’m pretty sure I’m going to need a place to park it. The thing is, there are just so many of them out there. The last time I embarked on an adventure like this, finding a place to stay was easy peasy. (Not sure where that came from. Trust me. I have never said “easy peasy“. Never in the 60s; never now). But it was. Since there was no real way of knowing what was out there, the best one could do was find some hotel chain with a 1-800 number and give them a dingle. Room booked. Maybe there was something better. Maybe not. How would you ever know? But now. Now the world is your oyster and all it takes is a keystroke or two to have access to thousands of possible places to rest your head, what with everyone and their brother renting out spaces. Not only that, “the google” lets you walk around all of the surrounding blocks which truly is the next best thing to being there. Possibly better. And just in case you’re still not sure, there are several hundred people who will let you know exactly what they think about your potential home away from home. The problem is, with all this choice it’s hard to make a choice. Which is why it seems to be taking so long to do so.

Ok. We might also be a “little” picky.  But who would argue that location is really, really important? No one. It goes without saying that if you are going to be somewhere for an extended period of time you need a full kitchen, preferably with four burners. Give us a break. We cook!. Which is why we also need a dining room table with reasonably comfy chairs. Washer and dryer. How else will we stay neat and tidy?  You’ve got to agree there’s nothing like enjoying your morning coffee on a sun filled terrace. Bedside tables and lamps. Where else will you put your glasses at night? A walk-in shower is simply accident prevention at its finest.  And is it asking too much to have a cushy couch for relaxing after a full day of sightseeing? I don’t think so. Clearly you now understand why this endeavour is taking up so much of my time. Of course you do. 

Well I better split. But before I go there’s one more thing. If I have to say so myself, this is gonna be one outta sight trip.

 

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Oh Deer!

Sorry to be so late but I have been busy. You see I’ve been planning a trip we may or may not take in the rather distant future. But since we are thinking about it, I thought it would be a good idea to sort out where we would go, where we would stay (I’m kinda partial to 5 stars), what we would do, and how we would get there if we actually do get there. The thing is, thanks to the “Google” and all of its terrific tools, by the time you figure all of these things out you’ve pretty much made your way through each and every town you plan on visiting. I mean I’ve seen nooks and crannies that I probably won’t be able to find once I arrive, if in fact, we do arrive. And in case you are thinking that all of this could be for naught, well it’s not. Because even if we don’t go on this trip that I have literally spent hours and hours researching, my time has not been entirely wasted since it has given me a rather legitimate excuse for not doing what I really should be doing at this time of the year. Gardening.

I’m quite sure I may have mentioned this once or twice in my past writings, and if so, I am mentioning it again which I don’t think is unreasonable given the longevity of this blog. Heck, if you were talking to me face to face it’s entirely possible that I would tell you the same story twice in one hour. I’m afraid I’m way past the age where I can track what’s been said to whom or how many time I’ve said it. So bear with me one more time when I tell you that, and I say this with reverence to those who do, I don’t really like gardening. And now that I’ve said it, if you don’t mind, please keep it to yourself as it has occured to me that in my new (relatively) neck of the woods it’s a sentiment akin to blasphemy. This, of course, is based only on my observations and the fact that almost everyone I meet seems to be able to identify each plant we come upon by both its common and scientific nomenclature. I, on the other hand, simply use colour as my primary identifier as in “it was the pretty purple one with the green leaves”.

To be fair, I was quite optimistic about having a change of heart when moving from the tundra to what comes as close as anywhere in Canada to a mediterranean climate. Let’s face it. Conditions here are different. First of all you actually get to plant your flowers in the “real” Spring, not the redefined one that starts after the snow melts sometime in early June. You can do so with the confidence that there will be no early summer killing frosts that cause you to transform the sheets on your bed into a virtual tent city on your front lawn. Not only that, there are few worries about midsummer hail that instantly transforms those gloriously beautiful roses you’ve coddled for the last month into tumbleweed. And there are actually a few more than 73 days of warmth and sun to allow those tomatoes of yours to ripen on the vine rather than on your kitchen counter. So you would think, wouldn’t you, now that I am here and no longer there, that I would be happy to get a little dirt under these nails of mine. But it’s just not so.

The thing is, and it should have twigged the first time I ventured out to get my tulip bulbs but it didn’t, there’s a different culprit here that, as they say, takes the bloom off the rose. Or perhaps more accurately, the tulip. I admit I could have paid more attention to the fact that, in my search for the perfect bulbs there were many marked “deer resistant”. But come on. I live in the middle of the city. A hop, skip and jump from downtown. Surely to goodness there are no forest creatures ambling down my street. At least that’s what I thought until one morning when I looked out my window. There he/she was, staring right back at me with what I can only imagine was a very satisfied grin. And as a shallow gal I believe I said the only thing that I could say. “Oh dear, there’s a deer”. Yep. Right in the middle of my garden was a little deer munching happily away on my tulips. The ones I had so carefully planted all those months ago. The ones that had just emerged from their winter slumber and were ready to bask in all of their colourful glory. And so it was that before my very eyes my garden had turned into a 5 star Michelin restaurant for critters. The only thing missing was the bone china. Now I know what you’re thinking. I used to think that deer were cute too. That is until they landed in my front yard and ate all of my flowers. Now I only wish they would come back to pick up the check.

So there you have it. The reason that despite my move to the gardening capital of Canada I am spending my real time planning a theoretical trip.  Maybe I should add a stop in Amsterdam. I hear they have some lovely tulips there.

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Road Trip!

For those of you who have been with me for the long run, or who may know me face-to-face as we like to call it these days, you are most probably aware that I don’t really like to fly. And that’s putting it mildly. It’s not that I don’t fly. For awhile there I was flying about once or twice a month, most often with the aid of my “mother’s little helper” (for those who don’t know) which, coincidentally, I typically got from my Mother. When I decided I could take on the task “cold turkey” I spent a lot of hours telling the person who was unfortunate enough to have randomly selected a seat beside me, that I used to take drugs to fly but now I get through the ordeal by talking incessantly to whoever it is that was unfortunate enough to have randomly selected the seat beside me. Realizing that wasn’t my best moment, of late I have resorted to minding my own business and plugging into a RomCom that I have hopefully seen less than four times in the recent past. It helps, but I readily admit that I still have a rather fragile relationship with the concept of flight. So it might not surprise you that the recent air tragedies have made me more than a little jittery about getting back on that horse even though I suspect the WestJet flight attendants have dropped the “let’s get this Boeing going” quip from their “welcome aboard”. The problem is I still, at times, have to travel, which means I have been giving some very considered thought to what could be reasonable alternatives to get me to where I need to be. Which, might I add, can be just a little challenging and involve one or more modes of transportation given that I now live on an Island.

My first thought, as I suspect would be the case for any true blue Canadian, was to get on a train. To be honest, if I had a bucket list (which I don’t) this might be one of the things on it. Crossing Canada on a train. Of course I first have to get on a boat, and then a bus followed by a subway to the station but, while perhaps a little cumbersome, still seems quite doable. Provided I can pare down my wardrobe to fit into one carry-on as the prospect of schlepping a full size suitcase up, down and over whatever obstacles I might encounter is not, at my age, exactly enticing. But I’ve heard the scenery is spectacular, at least until you hit the prairies. Then it’s not. Never mind. The food’s good, I can watch Schitts Creek and if I play my cards right I can snag a cabin for one. All this for just north of 3500 dollars. Yeah it’s a tad pricey but it only takes four days to get from here to where I need to be. Wait. Let me say that one more time. Four days.  Four very, very long days. Watching Schitt’s Creek. Ok, I’m not going to do that and I’m certainly not going to take a bus (I didn’t even have to research that one) so where does that leave me? You guessed it. Road trip! Although I have to be honest that I’m a little hesitant from the get go about this one too.

For some people a road trip is everything they have always dreamed about. You know how it goes ‘cause you’ve seen it on the TV. The happy couple loads up the bright, shiny, new SUV, buckles the kids into the backseat, loaded iPads in hand, and sets off on the adventure of a lifetime, with smiles the likes of which rival those in the whitest of white toothpaste commercials. They travel along the ocean byways, sun shining brightly in the deep blue sky with nary another car to be seen for miles. Along the way they stop at all of the interesting and fun “off the beaten track” places, become immersed in the local customs and cultures, meet the most engaging people, and always manage to find a quaint B&B that serves mouthwatering meals in a dining room with unobstructed views of the sun setting over the ocean. You can almost hear the waves and feel the breezes as you watch this spectacle from the comfort of your Lazy Boy. Makes you want to run upstairs, pack a bag, grab the family and get your own show on the road. Except we all know that’s not how it really goes. Especially for a shallow gal like me.

You see, for a shallow person a road trip, as are most things in life, is not about the journey. It’s about the destination. When I get into a car I want to get where I’m going and I want to get there fast. Mostly because a “real” road trip almost always includes wicked weather, long waits in world class traffic jams (have you ever driven through LA or TO ?), enough fast food to have a significant impact on your cholesterol count, and a series of hotels that remind me to heed my Dad’s bedtime advice to “sleep tight and not let the bedbugs bite”. Sure there are viewpoints and little out of the way artisans to visit but that would mean stopping and the last thing I want to do when I get in a car is stop. I won’t even talk about the restrooms one encounters along the way even though at this stage of the game those are the stops there’s no getting around. And now with all the texting and talking and general inattention paid by your fellow commuters there’s no guarantees. Not that there ever were. It’s just these days I don’t really like the odds. Road trip? Not if this kid can help it. 

Oh well. Looks like I’ll be back in those friendly skies sooner than later. Better give my Mother a quick call. I’m thinking she might have a little something to help me out.

 

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